flower power

bouquet making lesson today..

=D

one new random skill

i learnt how to make candy floss today. =D 

even if everything else fades away, still You remain

chinese new yearr!

HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYONE!! 

this year's visiting has been a bit different: 

i haven't taken many photos this year (less than 70 usually there are like 200 photos over 2 days), i am excessively tired, i might not be able to visit everyone i intend to, people are visiting my house, my house is really really nice and neat and clean and lovely for once?!

hahaha. 

a lovely start to a new year ahead. =) 

i can't wait for school to start tmr. i need to stop snacking on those lil cereal tarty things and start exercising. i can feel those arteries choking already. 

destructive energy

Father... why on earth did u make me so strong?! 

T.T

festivities

oh Father, knowing the lard-bucket that i am, please give me the self-control to minimize my snacking over the next 15 days. the spirit is willing but the flesh is weak.. 

sometimes small things light up your day

i finally understand why nat thinks indian guys are hot. =D

my innermosts

sometimes i really get tired of all this. seriously, its just nonsensical. i wonder why i am still here after so long, just waiting and waiting. i'm not worried, i'm just tired. 

sometimes its seems very futile, cos in the end everything moves back to square one. and mistakes made are not learnt, problems are not solved. things are just perpetuated at limbo. 

sometimes i just want to get up and go. to just walk away from everything these past 4 (coming 5 years) has brought, every single thing. just move on, start over again and forget everything that has happened. 

i don't understand how everything even became like this, how things came to this stage. why why why? i don't understand at all. 

yet each time i am compelled by my exhaustion and impatience, i am simply overwhelmed by God's promise. wait, He says. just be still and wait, and surely my Word will come to pass. 

i can't see out of this endless dark tunnel now. this abyss that i am trapped in, almost willingly. but i am trusting, because i know everything will be beautiful in His time. He said that He will be a light unto my path, so He will surely guide my steps even in the dark. 

Father, you see my heart, you know my innermosts. i only want Your will to be done, and i will cling to You because You are my only hope. 

Beautiful Saviour

Jesus

Beautiful Saviour

God of all Majesty

Risen King

Lamb of God

Holy and Righteous

Blessed Redeemer 

Bright morning star

All the heavens shout your praise

All creation bows to worship You

How wonderful, how beautiful

Name above every name

Exalted high

How wonderful, how beautiful

Jesus Your name

Name above every name

Jesus

=)

tugging at my heart strings

Proverbs 4:23 - 

Above all else, guard your heart, 

for it is the wellspring of life. 

every little girl's dream

Daddy, i want to marry him when i grow up. pleaseeeeeeeee... 

why why why

okay, seriously, this is totally killing me. 

moving forward

i remembered some time ago bea was sharing with me that the important people in her Christian walk have all left her side. it left her very crushed at first, but later she realised that it was a season where God wanted to deal with her alone. i couldn't quite comprehend everything she was telling me at first, but i'm finally starting to get a gist of what she was saying. basically, moving out of the comfort zone. 

its in moments of your greatest vulnerability that God becomes strong. in my confusion and anxiety, with a heavy heart and very restless spirit, to sit down and listen. and yes, the humility to admit that i've been a pighead so far so that i can make the u-turn and get right again. i think there are some serious problems with my personality that require moulding. it really didn't help that my previous relationship only allowed me to bring out the worst in myself. 

there are two parts of the fruit of the spirit that i have some problems grappling with, one of them is gentleness. the people i meet and know me can describe me in a varied number of adjectives: outgoing, happy, responsible, motivated, etc. but i am quite sure gentleness doesn't even cross their minds about me. the other one is self control, something i believe every single human being on the face of this planet struggles with every day. but yet, without making sure those two parts are right in my life, sad to say, i have an incomplete fruit. 

break me and mould me again. and i will be complete in You. 

'Of course, i quite agree that the Christian religion is, in the long run, a thing of unspeakable comfort. But it does not begin in comfort; it begins in the dismay i have been describing, and it is no use at all trying to go on to that comfort without first going through that dismay. In religion, as in war and everything else, comfort is the one thing you cannot get by looking for it. If you look for truth, you may find comfort in the end: if you look for comfort you will not get either comfort or truth - only soft soap and wishful thinking to begin with, and, in the end, despair.'  - C.S. Lewis

landslide inside

I feel crazy, hope is hazy right now 

but i won't freak out, i won't freak out at the sound of the

landslide inside, fear wants to take my peace of mind

won't run, won't hide, i will lift my hands up high

in my trouble, i have doubled my prayers

because i need them, i need them like i need the air

landslide inside, fear wants to take my peace of mind

won't run, won't hide, i will lift my hands up high

here's to the Name above all names

i will trust You Jesus i'll be brave

i will live my life day by day

because you're the only Truth, the only Way out of this 

landslide inside, fear wants to take my peace of mind

won't run, won't hide, i will lift my hands up high

here's to the Name above all names

here's to the only one who saves

i will trust You Jesus i'll be brave

in the end, i still choose you, Father. even though i don't really understand, and even though everything around is crumbling. even though the enemy seems to be laughing at the things i've lost, and my heart hurts to the point my chest aches. i know that every tear is precious to you, and i know you will make things right in your time.